This topic, based on the “Maternity and Well-Being” discussion at the FICA Women’s Conference, has two main parts to it: women in capoeira having children, and relationships between capoeiristas in the same group.
Having been in neither situation…I don’t know how much I can really say about this. Consider that a disclaimer!
From my own observations, all of the capoeiristas with families that I’ve seen have been pretty good at sharing childcare time (taking turns training, going to different classes, etc.), and the rest of the group usually seems more than happy to help out. Actually, something I’ve noticed everywhere is that it seems like all capoeiristas are really good with children!! As someone who dreads playing/working with children even more than partner work (it would be so like me to faire une bêtise and hurt them by accident; and there is nothing more scathing than a scornful young person; and how does one relate to a 6/12/15-year old??), I’ve always wondered why/how this is?
I will say, also, that I have yet to see a capoeirista who has had a baby look like she was ever pregnant in her life! So I definitely agree with the discussion group people who said the best way for a capoeirista to get back in the game is to just keep training—if they ever stopped in the first place. I’ve seen women playing and training while at least a few or more months pregnant, so I imagine they must have gotten back into things pretty quickly after giving birth.
If a woman has a baby and her partner doesn’t do capoeira, then I think that capoeira counts as a major enough part of a capoeirista’s life that her partner should care and be considerate enough to take that into account when splitting childcare duties, at least to a certain extent and provided that the partner doesn’t have something the equivalent of capoeira in their own life. (If that’s the case, then both should compromise to give up equal times of their activity and take care of the child equally.)
And while I agree with the idea that new parents can stay involved with the academy by doing admin work, helping with events, and playing music, I think it’s also important to recognize that this in no way is a fair substitute for actual training! So while it’s a good way for the parent(s) to stay connected to the academy while they’re physically or otherwise incapable of training, people (namely partners, and friends and capoeira colleagues to a lesser extent) should help out to try and make sure they can get back to normal training as soon/much as possible.
As for relationships between capoeiristas…well, I can see several pros and cons to this.
Pros:
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You majorly have something in common.
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You get to see them more often, and will understand each other’s crazy committment to that Brazilian martial art form nobody can even pronounce properly.
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Training/playing in the roda might be more fun/interesting.
Cons:
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You might see them too much and have space issues.
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It might be hard separating the relationship from capoeira life, kind of like people in office relationships have trouble keeping them separated from work life.
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If it goes bad, capoeira or training might become a source of stress for you, and you’ll no longer be able to count on it as your standard all-purpose stress-reliever.
On the other hand, this reminds me of two things I’ve been told in capoeira. The first is that when you’re in capoeira, when you’re training or in the roda, everyone else is just another capoeirista. In the roda, the other person isn’t your mother, your friend, or your significant other; they’re a capoeirista, and moreover a capoeirista you’re currently playing inside the capoeira roda.
The second? In the all-too-immortal words of one of my capoeira teachers:
“Training solves everything! If you’re sad, you train! If you’re happy, you train! If you’re angry, you train! Love, anger, sadness, depression…training solves EEEVVVERRRYYTHING!”
Picture source: http://www.capoeirasantabarbara.com/images/cd2-kids2.jpg
Known for sayings such as the above and “The only way to get rid of temptation is to yield to it,” Oscar Wilde is one of my favourite authors. It occurred to me the other day that despite his Oxford schooling, 19th century dandyism, and the fact that he was gay—he might actually have made a pretty good malandro [Edit: a pretty good typical/traditional malandro]. After mining through a huge list of famous quips and witticisms, I’ve shortlisted 8 gems that hold valuable lessons for us about capoeira. Who’d have thought? Now read on and yield to the temptation…
I never realized before this year how many different “types” of capoeira mestres there were, in terms of the roles they played within their respective groups and the relationships between them and each of their students. For instance, this year saw the first time a mestre insisted on getting me a drink at a bar, instead of delivering to my group and me a lecture against drinking! 
Until recently, Brazilians dominated the market on capoeira books, yet the form has spread across the globe over the last four decades. This expansion from the favelas (slums) to the world stage has introduced a host of new capoeira practitioners with varied lineages, techniques, and traditions. In Capoeira Beyond Brazil, Aniefre Essien brings an international, political perspective to capoeira, speaking to both the novice and aficionado, as well as to historians, martial artists, social justice organizers, and youth development professionals.
One thing that I failed to mention in the post about 
For roughly the first year and a half of my training capoeira, my mainstay was one of our academy’s branch classes, and I only ever went to the academy for occasional rodas or near batizados times. Since my teachers at our branch didn’t speak Portuguese, and I wasn’t really taught, thus known, by teachers who did, I suppose that’s why I never got an apelido. However, I’d started taking dance classes taught by one of the academy’s teachers, and thanks to summer vacation, had started venturing into the academy more often.
Actually, that quote was from after my last roda with my grupo, before leaving home for a while, and it was true because I had cried driving home from my last class, two days before. (By the way, tears and night-time and pouring rain and trying to pass a bus pulling out from the curb all at the same are never a good idea.)
I suppose getting my first belt was kind of a big deal, but to me it seemed more of a formality than anything else. To be honest, I’m not sure if I can even remember who played me on the stage, and I suppose it didn’t hold as much significance for me because I knew anyone could get the first belt just for three months of regular attendance; it was only based on “participation marks”, in other words. My second belt, however—I never expected to receive that when I first started capoeira, and when I did receive it, I hadn’t been planning to let myself start hoping for it till about 6-12 months later.
Hey everyone, I wanted to tell you about an awesome capoeira blog/website I’ve been following for a bit now, called 
Mandingueira 
